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Salam ‘Alaikom,
Thanks for composing so you’re able to all of us. We realize just how tough it’s and make feel from objections that are grounded much more within the cultural and you can individual preferences and you may shorter in religious and moral prices. Comment a few of the products we expose below so that you will come for some decision about how we need to handle this issue together with your mothers.
First, during specific schools out of envision a good Muslim lady need the brand new permission away from their wali (guardian) locate partnered, there was solid contract one a great Muslim guy can also be marry versus this new permission off his parents. We should state first, although not, that people can be found in absolutely no way indicating that Muslims your investment central role you to parents normally and must play regarding wedding procedure. not, such as your instance, the parents try insisting with the a certain attitude that is actually not served inside the Islam, we.elizabeth. not wanting a candidate getting matrimony founded strictly to your racial and you will cultural considerations.
2nd, based on that which you wrote, we feel that the parents will most likely not only be emphasizing race and you will society, even so they may have various other legitimate inquiries also. Let’s start with their entryway you are “maybe not the ultimate Muslim.” We’re not yes how you are utilising the term “finest,” and is possible that you and your moms and dads including differ on how “perfect” an effective Muslim you are. Since you are trying wed a woman who’s today Christian but is intending to return to help you Islam, your mother and father will also be concerned that your particular faith will suffer as you are not “perfect” on your own practice today and you will she’s going to become merely getting started in mastering concerning faith.
A special chance would be the fact your mother and father are inextricably linking Islam with Turkish people, we.elizabeth. getting Turkish is equal to becoming Muslim. Again, they may not be alone in this way because the a lot of people regarding various other societies have comparable impression. The theory should be to help your mother and father know that individuals of all of the racial and you may social history is also and you can manage end up being Muslims. Such as for instance reverts must just surrender people areas of the cultures that are expressly taboo inside the Islam, we.elizabeth. having a drink, consuming chicken, and ancestral praise only to name several. Almost every other areas of their community from origin can and should become chose should they are located in range having Islamic instruction. Your mother and father you are going to feel threatened your upcoming students doesn’t feel coached Turkish people because their mother isn’t Turkish.
3rd, i need you never to characterize this issue you are up against just like the a possibly or, i.elizabeth. either you going a great sin by disobeying your parents and marrying that it woman or you going a sin by the “blindly” obeying your mother and father rather than marrying so it lady. The facts on the condition is you might possibly be stored accountable for your actions and just how you would those ideas. The difficulty off obeying your parents was a legitimate that, but you are an older adult and will also be held responsible for your strategies. Islam affords you the ability to marry an effective righteous Muslim woman without any consent of your own moms and dads, while it is firmly needed to have your parents’ true blessing since your progress on the wedding. Try not to thought cracking from every connections together with your parents just to get married which woman. You actually have an obligation in order to support friends hence, you need to do everything in what you can do to come to some common expertise along with your parents about it material.
Fundamentally, you should do everything can to save clear outlines out of telecommunications together with your mothers to allow them to understand that you do not decide to ditch possibly Islam otherwise Turkish people. They should listen to away from you you have it objective planned. Assist them to to uncover you plus future spouse often battle not just to be great Muslims, however, that you’ll do everything it is possible to to steadfastly keep up new Turkish culture as well. Maybe, you could potentially impede marrying that it lady for many months therefore she can make the decision in order to become a great Muslim as well as start training the fresh new faith. Because an excellent Muslim, when the she will provides uniform communication with your mothers, perhaps that may help your mother and father to be more comfortable with their future child-in-legislation. Generate lots of du’aa (supplication) in order to Allah (swt) and Istikhara (prayer for suggestions) and find His (swt) ssistance as you build your ultimate decision. And you can Allah (swt) understands ideal.
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